One woman sought to find out these answers. Jamie Cat Callan, the author of the 2009 book, French Women Don’t Sleep Alone, is American, but grew up with a French grandmother. She realized that French women had a certain something that Americans just don’t seem to have. So, she went to France to learn how they achieve that seemingly effortless mix of charm and seduction.
How do French women seduce men? Here are her ten biggest takeaways:
1. Stop dating
French women don’t date — yes, really! Start by getting off the dating treadmill and meeting your man in the context of a group of friends and admiring men. RELATED: 8 Dating Mistakes That Secretly Reveal You’re Not Ready For Love 2. Throw a party And not just any party — an actual grown-up fete. Let’s leave those rowdy college parties with cheap beer and too-loud music in the past. Think more of Breakfast at Tiffany’s, instead of basically every movie set in college ever. Besides, what better way is there to prove to everyone you know that you’re a sophisticated, worldly woman than with a memorable get-together? Invite both old and new friends. Show off your culinary and entertaining skills.
3. Walk the walk
French women walk everywhere. Yes, it’s great exercise, but they also are doing it to be seen. When you go for a walk with a potential lover, he doesn’t know it’s a date. Plus, he sees other men looking at you, so he knows there’s competition.
4. Get offline and get in line
French women prefer it the old-school way, so shut Tinder down for a little while. They meet men in museums, bars and at parties (didn’t we already mention how important parties are?). Being charming and a little bit seductive is a matter of survival, so they’ll chat up everyone. RELATED: How To Get A Boyfriend In 10 Simple Steps
5. Fraternize on the job
Ditch the genderless business suit and wear something a bit come-hither. But always keep it classy, of course, especially in a work setting. There are plenty of ways to look chic and stand out, without compromising certain in-office dress codes.
6. Be natural
The French look is all about nature. This means choosing one body part and showing it off. Less is more, ladies.
7. Say hello to your ex
You’ll never know when you’ll need a date or someone to add to your coterie, so there’s no reason not to remain cordial, at least. RELATED: Why He Keeps You Around Even If He Doesn’t Want A Relationship
8. Create a coterie
This is the all-important group of friends with whom you go to bars, museums, and concerts. It’s basically a classier, more sophisticated-sounding term for “squad.”
9. Get smart
There’s truly nothing sexier than intelligence. French women know that being brainy is hot. They never just rely on their stunning looks and great fashion sense to get them through life.
10. You have the right to be moody
That’s right, girl! Express yourself. Don’t ever hide any of your emotions. Let yourself be the complicated, beautiful woman that you really are. You are ze woman. He is ze man. You are passionate! Do you have ze problem with that? Life is a whole lot more fun when you’re not trying to act sane all the time! RELATED: 6 Ways To Be Mysterious When Flirting With A Guy Over Text Sarah Harrison is an editor and content strategist whose work has appeared in The Guardian, Vice, The New York Times, The Independent, and Psychology Today.